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Literal While studying for a college final, my thought-life became derailed. Unable to focus on anything productive, I scrounged my imagination for something that would help me become anchored. A simple, low-brow joke came to mind. As the essense of the joke stole my focus, I decided to doodle - the results are the strip mentioned herein. |
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Not true in the slightest Paleolithologists have recently found two new callings - these callings are of such a degree that students majoring in either of these areas are given scholarships, immediate job postings, and free mammal skeletons of their choice. The first of these callings is that of justification for the word paleolithology. Originally designed to indicate the study of old and archaic writing, it has recently been discovered that a number writings from the paleolithic era have been faked. Vast archives of caveman poetry are to be used to construct new exhibits around the world under the title "How to establish yourself as an authority" and the caveman coffee cups, so often thought to be the work of a particularly gifted cave-dweller, have been shown as purchased off the internet (www.cavemenareus.com). Instead, those paleolithologists whose task it was to catelogue and research these artifacts are now going into etymology law, and it has been fairly common to see scientists who have specialized in paleolithology to go back for post-graduate work in etymological studies. The second calling is the documentation and discovery of a small species of birds thought to have left no trace. Startling new writings have borne evidence of a species of bird that appears to have originally been able to fly but developed a form of sarcasm to replace its vestigial wings. Evidence has been discovered that several thousand years ago small groups of primitive chickens travelled in packs. As modern-day chickens are omnivores, so too were these "fallen chiickens" also omnivores, able to eat a large variety of rather small objects. And the ancient writings which document their habits, preferences, and diet, note that a number of modern conveniences which we believed to be initially created by inventors in our culture were found to have been common-place in theirs. This would normally have resulted in millions of dollars in patent law being up-ended overnight; but, legal precedence doesn't apply in this case, as the civilization that made use of the technology has ceased to exist for many hundreds of years. Thus, please allow these early paloelithologic artifacts some modicum of respect - their discovery has changed the life of many millions of modern-day scientists and redditologists. |
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